Take Off

Take off, we rise. I slip my headphones in and I begin to drift away. The music begins to flow into my ears as my head nods in agreement to the words being sang. I smile when I think of You and how You loved me before I did anything, before I was. Not because of the way I make you feel, but because of who I am and who You are.

7 mile Sunday

The alarm goes off, I awake fatigued. The nights sleep was not sleep at all but a battle in the mind. Empty I awake, fullness is what I search for. I slip the shoes on, as each foot hits the pavement my mind wanders to ease the bodies pain. Where am I going? The path is familiar cause I have traveled it many times before. Sometimes with You sometimes without. Confused I think about last night and wonder what I gave up and what could have been. I have to keep running, faster, so I don't think about the past. As my feet stop moving you tap me on the arm and remind me why I am here, why I am doing what I do, and why I must continue on. Stay strong you say and I reply always.

Thankful

How I am thankful, so very thankful. For You have transformed me, you continually change me. You faithfully chip away hardened deposits of pain and remorse that surround this heart. Because of grace I am beginning to understand, I am able to forgive and be forgiven. You draw me closer to You, closer to understanding.

Are You Ready

Are you ready? Who defines you, who you are, how you feel, how you respond? Deep down lies a desire to be understood, to be known, to be significant. Where does this come from, are they just burning desires of the heart, or a simple confusion of the mind, or much more? Is there a clear cut path to understanding, or can these answers even be answered with knowledge alone? They are all around us, those who think these feelings should be filtered, sometimes suppressed or maybe even ignored. If this is done are you being true to yourself or are you just disregarding what you might not fully understand or want to understand? What is preventing you from searching for your identity, from finding your potential? Are you ready yet?

Day Dream

Sitting on the bench, body fatigued, mind wandering, the scene appears. You approach, noses so close they almost touch, time freezes, background blurs, its just you and me. But this is only for a moment a brief moment. Time has now resumed and we begin to drift apart. I reach out and you follow, our fingers try an meet but they never do. The world has pulled us apart it has called this separation to occur. Back to reality, I stare in the mirror and try to understand, will we meet again, will it last.

Communion

Drained I enter and sit down. It is not long before the words flow and meet me only where You can go, deep inside. I wait until everyone has gone to meet you at the table. I reach into the bowl and am drawn to the piece that is twisted, that is bent, that is not perfect. As I dip the piece it becomes covered, the imperfections can no longer be seen and I begin to be filled. The music starts and begins to flow through my veins which pumps out into my body to send me this feeling of euphoria I now write about. The Spirit has now taken control of my body and the words begin to flow out. The singing turns into a smile, a smile which has been long awaited.

Trust in Me

Do you trust in me? Have I not supplied you with the clothes that now cover your back. Have I not rescued you time and time again, when you laid ashamed with your head faced down towards the ground. So why now do you think I am not big enough? How easily you forget how big I really am, what I have taken you from and where I plan for you to go. Trust Me.

Why Can't I Let You Go

My hand reaches out but you are no longer there, my heart searches for its missing piece. Thoughts of hope run in my head, what I would give for one moment with you, for a day where our past was wiped clean where our hearts where let free, just you and me. Or am I just scared am I scared of knowing someone more then you, allowing someone to know more then you. Is it that I am scared to just let go.

The Way

Shutting my eyes the piano plays the background music in my mind. I walk the streets, but they have changed, the people are moving in all different directions. I continue in the same direction, the same path, but as I turn the page the next looks nothing like the last, which differs from the very first. Ever since I met You I was changed my life took on a direction. So tonight I am thankful, so very thankful for You.

Goddaughter

Seven months ago I sat at a table with you for the first time, I couldn't see but you were there, Seven hours ago I saw you for the first time when you entered this world weighing seven pounds and some odd ounces. Eyes clinched shut you searched for a voice, so I let my voice find you. Arms flaying you aimlessly grasped, so I let you cling onto my finger. You are so beautiful, so uniquely perfect.

A Refresher

Its been a long time since I sat in the quietness. It is only now that I am allowing my true senses a chance to take over. The pen glides across the paper as the words flow from thought, shadows reach across the tile floor as a ray of sunlight seeps in. My toes are kept warm by my long haired companion, who lays asleep on the floor. Where has it gone, what has it been used for. I ask this about time, about life.

The Best Feeling

I must pursue. My mind races sending a signal to my heart which begins to beat faster. I pursue, I will go, I am excited about the adventure that lies ahead of me. You have broken the chains, You have unleashed this wild heart, this heart that yearns for meaning, for adventure, that has a desire that can only be quenched by You and You alone. 

Forever Changed

I was taken to Haiti to learn not what I thought I might learn or how I thought I might learn it. When a young orphan takes your hand and smiles, when they stay by your side the whole day walking barefooted next to you never once complaining only looking into your eyes with complete trust, complete happiness. This is where Love can be found this is what Love looks like, to be without and be complete to not have yet have so much more. These are God's children. I will not leave you here, I will slumber no longer. I have been awakened to your design. You have molded me to whom I am in all my uniqueness. I rise to your call to your purpose.

Fairwell

I hope out of bed to say the morning goodbyes, a handshake followed by a hug. A few words of encouragement and then they are off. Not many words may have been spoken this week, but a bond most won't understand was formed. For this I am thankful. 

More than an Orphan

I have to duck to enter the small chained door which leads down the narrow hallway opening to where I find you. You approach me wide eyes wearing an oversized shirt causing your shoulder to hang out. You reach out and grasp my hand, your whole hand fits into my palm. You grab a hold of my leg until I lift you into my arms, your head rests against my shoulder and in that moment I wonder what you are thinking. Everything else becomes background, but the moment you and I share.

The Mountain Experience

What once stood so far away, now towers over us. The terrain is never the same and the path is not always clear, but our drive remains constant. With arms extended we are able to pass through the ravine. Foreign eyes glance us looks but are always followed with a smile and hello. What has become our adventure is their life. The thick grass that once covered the mountains base, has now turned to stone and gravel. Fighting for our footing we ascend one after the other. The walk turns into a run, we are so close. My body freezes I am there, I am free. Maker of this mountain please continue to show me the way. 

Conversation

It often comes without warning, sometimes from people you least expect it from, an old man on a bus, a college student in the kitchen, a friend on a hike. When a heart is opened, a person becomes vulnerable and truth can be revealed. You speak in many ways and I am just being to understand. 

A Mornings Encouragement

I sit perfectly still, eyes closed. The wind rushes down the mountain passing through my half awakened body. This in combination with the birds song, lets me know the day has begun, and as I open my eyes fully for the first time, the bright glow peering through the vast clouds reassures me of your presence. 

Day Continued

As one part of the day ends the next begins. Covered in dirt I am handed a bucket, one after another, until the roof is covered. I am encouraged by my brothers work, next to me, all around me, It fuels me to continue, to not let my tired body give into its urge to rest. 

A Day Anointed

Awakened by the mountain I rise, stiffened from the restless sleep the night before. I prepare my heart for the day, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." I walk down the small corridor and enter the small room where the table lies in its center. The only air that enters comes from the small cracked window in the corner. I am handed a small yellow slip as the first patient enters. Peering into each of their eyes I begin to get a sense of their struggle, their hardship , the life that has hardened their exterior. As my translator interprets I realize these people are no different then us, in the end we are just people.